Life.

This is gonna be another emo blogpost.. just a heads up to  those who may want to skip this post.

Just went to visit grandma earlier just now. Her condition is deteriorating.  It hurts to see her in so much pain.. just like how mummy suffered.. 

I hate myself, for being unable to express how I feel inside.. I want her to know.. how much she meant to me.. and I really hate to see her suffer.. I just want her to get peace.. she's had enough of sufferings throughout her life. 

The pain just being there, watching her.. is indescribable. 

sorry for the lack of updates.