I've been trying.. but the path down the future seems so bleak and hard to grasp..
我很努力的不要去想。但是我办不到。
处处都是她的影子。她为我做的一切。她说过的一切。
She previously told me few times, if there's a day that comes where shes no longer here, she does not know what to do, because 她放不下我和爸爸。她担心我们不能照顾好自己。
她担心爸爸不会理我。
妈，我真的很想你。。
我每次念着想吃什么，你都会辛辛苦苦的自己跑到supermarket.. 大包大袋的扛回家。
辛苦你了。
现在的我，开始学煮了。It may not even be 1/3 like yours.. but 至少还能吃。
当女儿准备嫁人的时候，通常母亲都会准备嫁妆。
我想我不会拥有着些了。
不是想拥有什么金银首饰，对我来说没什么用。
All I want is something I could wear or keep, a gift from her.. as her blessings to me.
Something I could remember, her love for me.
妈妈对不起。
这么多年，我让你担心了。
你离开了以后，其实我一直装着坚强。
我失去了安全感。
没了母爱。。一切来得太突然，让我措手不及。
我没办法忘记你在医院里的点点滴滴，尤其是最后那几天。
你说承受的，已经超乎了我所能承受的。
Recently, my doctor seems to have suspected something's wrong with me..?
He asked if I needed to see a psychiatrist.. and recommends me to go..
I have not spoken to dad about this. I don't intend to.
